I love comics. I really, really, do. Also, I don’t mind a good time having a few drinks with some friends. It’s a good social experience, and if you’re of legal age, and responsible, I’d suggest doing it.
But, we all have people we’d rather have at our side at a party or at a bar. Comic guys, it’s gotta double. Lets play imagination land, and find the best and worst guys to swing down town with.
BEST
Hercules
Awww yeah
Man, I love Herc. He’s a good fun hero, and guess what? He knows how to have a good time. There have been a few stories where he solves problems by partying.
A couple years ago Herc was tricked by a foe to pretend to be Thor, and help the drow queen attack Asgard.
This one.
Now, Herc got her fooled into thinking he’s Thor. And you now how he seals the deal? Drinking, Dancing, and just plain partying. Of course the ruse is broken, but his skill of partying actually placated her. She even spoke at his funeral.
But that’s the thing with Herc. He LOVES a good time. And he’ll make sure you have it. He believes the Lion of Olympus should work hard, and party hard, and protect the human realm. This means a few things.
First, he’s a happy drunk. He wants to enjoy life. Enjoy it all. Second, he’ll get the drinks. Oh yeah not only is he loaded (living forever will do that) but he OWNS a brewery. And lastly, he will make sure you get home alright. He wants to make sure everyone has fun, and get home safe. That’s why Herc would be a blast to party with.
She-Hulk
She Hulk
Jen Walters used to be a shy gal. Well, then she got all gamma’d and she got to cut loose. She gets to have fun, and now she just loves it. She’s a good gal pal.
Lame song not withstanding
She’s shed her mousey self, and embrace her green party gal inside. Not only does this lead to her partying hard, but it leads to some awkward situations later. But, it may be a hard ride, but it’ll be a hell of one.
Lobo
The Bastich
Man, Lobo is pretty hard core. He’s also a very big party guy. He is immortal, so he pretty much goes to the edge each time. Not only can he drink, he can drink fatally, and still get up from it. He will make sure you have fun, the only down side? Well, you’re probably gonna have a huge bill. Or maybe if you’re lucky, he’ll sneak you out with him to skip the bill entirely.
The Worst
Spider-man
Not known for partying
Talk about a downer. I love Spidey as a hero, but imagine him at a party? He’s the guy who goes to a bar and orders a ginger ale. And if he DID get drunk, guess what would probably come up?
Hey.. you guys.. y'know my Uncle Ben died...
Not only would he just well up ALL his guilt, he would NOT stop talking about it. Yes Spidey, we know Norman killed Gwen. Yeah, total dick move. You did all you could. Yeah…
But really, not only would he be a super light weight, but you’d have to get him home. ALL while he’s lamenting on the bad things in his life.
Batman
He's had a little bit much
Man, I know people love Batman, but I cannot think that taking him to a party would be fun. Sure MAYBE Bruce Wayne, but this is the G-D Batman.
Not only would he really not be drinking. I imagine he’d be the fun killer of the entire party.
Have a beer Bats!
No thank you.
C’mon, its a party. You said you’d be cool.
Cool? Cool? What is cool about increasing my chance for liver failure? What is cool about alcohol inhibiting my motor skills? You want to see me throw Batarangs while under the influence? It would not be a pretty sight.
Uh… cool story bro..
Iron Man
Way to kill the party Tony
Tony Stark, is a recovered alcoholic. This is a good thing, but it kills a party. He’d be swinging around a bit, and really enjoy the ladies and the fun, but when drinking comes up. He’s gonna kill the party faster than anyone.
Also, if he DOES drink, he’s going to get a bit extreme. And he has access to lots of weaponry. This could lead to bad things.
As I was writing this, I unfortunately found out that someone else beat me to this, and did a much better job. So check out Chris Sims version. It’s much better.
